uncle cletus

Uncle Cletus died early this morning.

He was my dad's oldest and last surviving brother. Uncle Cletus was 85 and had been married for 62 years to Aunt Mary Alice.

Uncle Cletus farmed his whole life and was a damn good at it.

I can admit now that Uncle Cletus used to scare the wits out of me - but I was an easily frightened, timid child. I would get overwhelmed by all of the aunts, uncles and cousins when we went for a visit.

I grew up near Lebanon just a hour south of most of my cousins in the Logansport area. Between both sides of my family I had 14 aunts and uncles (not counting their spouses) and almost sixty cousins. Throw in the fact that Dad was the youngest in his family and had nieces and nephews almost his age, so most of my Spitznogle cousins were older than me, and in some cases already parents themselves. I was more comfortable hanging around the much smaller Grememspacher clan where I was the oldest grandchild and my aunts and uncles were younger than my parents.

After high school Uncle Cletus started asking me if I had a boyfriend and when I thought I might get married, stuff we certainly didn't talk about in my immediate family. I remember being so insulted, but too quiet to pipe up about it.

I don't know when the switch in my little brain flipped and I realized that Uncle Cletus was not giving me hell, but genuinely wanted me to be as happy as he and Aunt Mary Alice were.

When I worked at the coffeehouse Dad and I made many trips to Logansport to visit whoever was home. I always insisted that we swing by to visit Cletus. He was the healthiest eater that I know and he was "green" before anyone talked about recycling. Waste not, want not was his lifestyle. I was always offered food when I went to visit. I always said yes, even if I was not hungry just so I could see what smorgasbord of goodies was hiding in each of the margarine tubs in the fridge. I also loved that he refused to use paper plates and plastic ware at family parties. He'd bring plates and silverware with him.

Uncle Cletus remembered what veggies I liked. I loved visiting in the Springtime and walking to the edge of the yard with him to cut a handful of asparagus. The last few times he handed me the knife and with the curved blade and let me do the bending. I could always count on a sack full of beets in the Fall from his garden.

Grandma Nora died in 1951 when Dad was 15. I liked to quiz Uncle Cletus about her and what life was like when she was around. I know it changed dramatically after she died and Dad was sent to live with some neighbors for a while. One day Cletus reached up above a cupboard and handed me Nora's diary. Nora was also frugal and used the same calendar book for five years. When the year ended, she'd flip back to January 1 and start all over. Most of the posts concerned the weather and how many quarts of food she's canned. There were tantalizing entries: "Cletus home from the war," with no hint of emotion or details. My favorite was: "Lucille married today, served chicken salad." I was honored that Uncle Cletus trusted me the diary and I was careful to return it in good shape.

Uncle Cletus loved his little brother and was one of his biggest cheerleaders. He came to every party at the farm and I often overheard him bragging about Dad. Uncle Cletus' goodbye to me was always "take care of your dad," delivered with a wink.

Uncle Cletus loved the idea of Second Helpings and he and I talked about it every time we saw each other. He helped pick the sweet corn that Leo (his son, my cousin) would deliver each year. Uncle Cletus kept the parish nuns and priest in vegetables and anything else they might need.

He raised a wonderful family. Daughter Judi, Ann Herr and I were pen pals and Nancy Drew buddies, trading books each time we saw each other. Son Leo is amazing generous with his time and sweet corn.

You are missed Uncle Cletus. I feel like it is the end of an era.

Read the obituary here.

Here is a post I wrote about him earlier this year.

Here is the post about the last Spitznogle Christmas party.

saturday sadness

My dear brother-in-law Ron's niece died today. Jackie (on right) was only 28 years old. I only had the pleasure of meeting Jackie as few times - at Beth and Ron's wedding and at her grandfather's funeral in September, where this photograph was taken. Her funeral is Thursday at Saint Hedwig Catholic Church in South Bend.

My Uncle Cletus (85) is in St. Vincent's Hospital in Indianapolis. They are not sure what is wrong with him yet (they've ruled several things out). He was flown- helicoptered, from Logansport Friday evening. Right now he's being weaned off of a ventalator. I'm sure he's hating every second of this. Uncle Cletus has always been very active. I've never seen him sit still for longer than it takes to eat supper. He's the healthiest eater that I know. I learned about steaming vegetables from him!

Uncle Cletus a retired farmer, as retired as farmers ever get. He's still active on Cousin Leo's farm; organizing, painting, sweeping and feeding the dog. He is always dressed in at least two flannel shirts, overalls and a hat. He is always chilly and sleeps in a sock cap. It is hard seeing him in the hospital bed, wearing just a gown. No hat, no flannel.

As awful as all of that is, I feel guilty saying that I had fun at the hospital. There is a nice family room near the ICU unit. Dad and Cletus are from a family of nine children, and Cletus and Mary Alice had six children and they all have children. As you can imagine, there was lots of storytelling, laughter and card playing. Nothing like being surrounded by cousins.

[update: Uncle Cletus is off of the ventalator and is breathing on his own. Hopefully he'll be back home by the end of the week.]

the year that was -- 2008

The off-the-top-of-my-head highlights (in alphabetical order):

Austin City Limits Festival

Blogstock

Ireland

Lieber twins

Lost 25 pounds

NUVO cover story

Low lights (in order of importance): 

Deaths - Mr. Herr, Uncle Cletus and Larry and Kathy, Vi Walker

Held up

Financial challenges - replaced computer, replaced bathroom floor, dry basement, replaced camera, replaced cell phone, replaced locks, major truck repairs.....

Lots of great stuff happened this year. 

I got to travel and stretch my wings. The trip to Ireland and Austin were the first vacations I've taken in years that did not involve my family. Not that I don't love vacationing with them, but I loved exploring new things on my own. My computer died right after the Ireland trip and I didn't get the chance to properly write about it -- and about what a wonderful time I had.  I just figured out how to get the photos and notes I took off of the old computer. One of my goals for 2009 is to blog about that trip - and since I can't afford to take a trip like that for a while, it will be good to re-live it. 

The Austin trip was also amazing - I got to reconnect with Uncle Bruce and Cousin Sheila -- and I still owe them thank you notes. I was nervous about the Austin City Limits Festival. I was so sure that I'd be found out as a fraud - no journalism background, not an esoteric music freak or cool-kid blogger. The festival gave me a lot of confidence. I might not be up on the latest scarf-rock band, but I do my homework and I'm not afraid to ask questions. And I blogging about the festival and producing articles were great fun and helped me find my voice. I can see a big difference in my music writing since then - ironically it's closer to what you read on this blog.  And - I had a blast and made a new music-y friend. 

Blogstock was wonderful - and I got to meet a whole bunch of you. Jerry and I travel well together, I got to be in a parade and throw candy, the company was amazing, I rode a horse, ate amazing food and reveled in the fellowship of amazing people. 

Twins! The whole thing is amazing- the birth, the adorable kidddos and the way Tammy is handling it all with grace. And it makes me appreciate my dear niece and nephew even more. 

I spent the first 44 years of my life being skinny. Then something happened -- 30 somethings. It crept up on me. My activity level changed - my first desk-ish job and writing more = sitting more. My metabolism changed and menopause happened (shocking for someone so freakishly young, I know). I knew I'd been gaining weight and at Blogstock something really clicked - I realized how big I'd gotten when I needed a boost on to the horse. One of my young hip friends mentioned Weight Watchers. I always thought it was for old ladies (I know, I know) but when Amy said she was on WW, I went back to my office and signed up online. 

Apparently I just needed someone to tell me what to do! I am fanatical about tracking what I eat. The WW site makes it easy to count points and track progress. The weight loss has been steady and healthy. I've quit eating Twizzlers (more for you Ralph) and potato chips. I feel wonderful and I'm enjoying my smaller jeans and the wonderful compliments I'm getting. Just five more pounds! 

The NUVO cover story was amazing - it was a cool validation and gave me a huge confidence boost. I've been writing more and more (including something I can't talk about -- remember the jinx factor?). 

This year felt like it had more than it's share of adult crap. I was obviously affected by the deaths of Mr. Herr and Uncle Cletus. I'm still shocked about Larry and Cathy. Two of my close friends had dads die this year - Becky and Amy. My neighborhood mentor, Vi Walker died in December when I was so sick and I couldn't even get to the funeral. 

It was a hard year financially. I spend money on fun things -travel and the house, and not so fun things - replacing the computer and all of the stuff in my purse. And property taxes. Ugggh. 

But all and all it was a good year, although I am anxious to see what 2009 has to offer!

spitznogle christmas party (holiday party #26)

My cousin Judi and her lovely husband Rick hosted the Spitznogle Christmas Party. There are a bunch of us. Dad is the youngest of nine children. I have a ton (58) of first cousins. I think I'm about #50 in that group. I have cousins that are grand parents (I think there might be a great- grandparent or two in the group).  Most of them grew up in Cass County. You can imagine how hard it is to keep it all straight. I do a fairly good job of knowing every one's name, but I get stumped also. 

Judi and Rick have the perfect space for the party. A few years ago they built a barn with an eye toward also using it for parties. There is a loft with room for tables for games, a giant television, a bar and a pool table. As you can see, we like to start the pool sharks early. 

Here is a photograph of all of the aunts, uncles and cousins that were there. I'm in the middle, one of the few looking at the camera - it was my camera, so I knew where it was. 

Here are the remaining Spitznogle siblings. Aunt Lucille (81), Dad (71), Aunt Gertrude (82), Aunt Mary Alice (sister-in-law) and Uncle Cletus (83). 

Uncle Cletus is the family historian. 
The party was great fun and again I ate my weight in ham - this time in the form of delicious little ham sandwiches. It was fun to catch up with cousins, ohh and ahh over new babies, see how the children have grown and honor the ones who have gone. 

Dad talked me in to stopping at the Legion in Whitestown on the way home (see where I get it). 

Quite frankly, I found the place a little depressing. Lots of folks telling me that they drink there because the beer is so cheap. I did run in to some childhood friends that I have not seen for 20 years. I have to admit that my interest peeked when I spotted this glorious mullet. 

I cannot believe how obsessed I was with photographing this wonder. 

Of course I had to take dozens of other shots so I would not look like I was um, obsessed with photographing his mullet. 

On my way home (wonder where I get that?) I stopped to see the fabulous band The Benders. 

Tad Armstrong and David England

Kristin, Nora and Sarah

I had a lovely day and hit all facets of my life. I worked for a few hours in the morning, went to Logansport to hang out with relatives, had a glimpse of my home town roots and got to hear great music on the way home. 

It is a good life. 

month end wrap-up

September was busy - lots of work and meetings with a good dose of fun sprinkled in.
Here is the stuff I couldn't get organized enough to write about.

My friend Scott introduced me to the wondrous Flowing Well Park. As you can see I didn't plan properly - I only brought the glass jar. It was delicious water and a fun field trip.

My cousin Diane married the lovely Tony in Chicago and they threw a fun reception for the Indiana folks. The wedding featured all of my favorite things - cake, love, BBQ, open bar, music and a bouncy house. Pictured exiting the bounce house is June Bug, Nora and the bride (in green). I belong to the fabulous Riviera Club. When I managed the coffeehouse I used to live at the pool during the summer - sometimes spending five hours a day swimming, reading and napping. I am not able to take as much advantage of it now, but I still love it. I spent Labor Day weekend trying to squeeze in a whole summer of swimming.

Beth and I were honored to be Eucharistic Minsters for Uncle Cletus' Funeral Mass. He was buried in his WWII uniform. He was buried with the full military rites. You can see my dad saluting in the background. This photo brings tears to my eyes every time I look at it.

After the funeral dinner (where I ate a whole weeks worth of Weight Watchers points in fried chicken, green beans with bacon, mashed potatoes, gravy and pie) I hitched a ride with my cousin Chuck on his Harley Davidson. It was a blast, riding down the road in my dress. It is is very out of character for Miss Safety First to ride without a helmet. That said, I trust my cousin Chuck with my life and I said a little prayer that all of the other drivers would be just as careful.

I love line-cooking day at Second Helpings. I'm surrounded by friends and family and lots of laughter. Pictured: Mom, Nora, Ann Herr Mitchell and Mrs. Herr. My friend Kristi did a great job and we're roping her in to volunteering for every line cooking.

And later that night...as evidenced by the same dress....I attended a fundraiser/fashion show for Dress for Success. I love what Dress for Success does- outfitting women for job interviews and providing work clothes. I ran in to cousin Nina (granddaughter of Cletus and MaryAlice).

Talk Like a Pirate Day. Who can resist a chick in a mustache and tattoo?

Work Day at Tammy's. My dear friend Tammy is having twins. A great groups of troops rallied to paint, patch and assemble. I surprised Jerry on a ladder, not a good idea. I guess I'm not the brightest light bulb in the pack.

******

I had a total meltdown the day before my trip when I realized that my drivers licence was not in my wallet. I needed it to rent the car in Austin. I could always use my passport for i.d. for the plane and to get my press pass, but I had to have the licence for the car.

I combed my house, truck, brief case, pants pockets and anywhere else I could think that I might possibly have left it. No luck. I looked online to see what I needed for a duplicate licence. There were four absolute requirements and the passport could cover two of them, proof of residence was easily covered with a piece of postmarked mail. I was totally screwed on the proof of Social Security number. I certainly didn't have my original SS card - I'm not sure that I've ever seen it. It might be locked away at the farm. And I had no time to go to the SS office to get a letter stating that I'd applied for a duplicate card.

One of my co-workers convinced me to go to the licence branch just to see what they would say. I couldn't believe it when I laid my stuff down on the counter.
Do you know your SS number?
Yes and I rattled off the number, it got punched in to the computer.
Okay, that will be $10, get your photograph taken over there.

My "woo hoo I can rent a car" side wanted to do a victory dance. My social justice "none of our students could have gotten away with this" side was a little miffed, but quickly got over it.

I took this photo with my iPhone as I left the branch.

Last week I got this letter in the mail with my drivers licence tucked in it. I was scheduled to give a talk at 5:45 in the morning at a factory. I checked in to the guard house at 5:30 (I had to leave my house at 5:00) and no one ever came to fetch me. I finally left at 6:15, never using the factory ID that I was issued. The guy forgot to give me my drivers licence when I handed him the ID. Fine, its early in the morning. But why did it take three weeks to mail it back? I probably would have gotten a good laugh out of the whole thing if the letter didn't imply that I'd messed up....I never left the guard house and I was never told the meeting was cancelled.

On the bright side: I like my new photograph better and now the weight is actually right.

Here's to a new month. Cheers!

cousins

I'm related to all of these beautiful feet

I jokingly asked on facebook yesterday if watching CBS Morning Show counted as going to church. I knew that my closer-to-God moment was not far away - it was Spitznogle Christmas party day!

I just love my cousins to pieces, but back in my younger days I was a little scared of them. 

Keep in mind that I was a wussy kid. And that we have 39 first-cousins on the Spitznogle side and I was in the younger end of the group - our dad is the youngest of his nine siblings, so I have cousins closer to Dad's age than mine. A good chunk of those cousins lived in the same county, attended the same schools and church so they all knew each other and were close. And I as I said, I was a wuss.

Now I can sort out all of our generation and most of the next - facebook has been great for keeping in touch and sharing photographs. 

There was a table full of family photographs for the taking. I got some great ones - Grandma Nora and Grandpa Paul's wedding, photos of Dad as a child and of my siblings.

AVS, Uncle Cletus, Nora (late 1999-ish, I'm guessin')

Although I would have sworn that I'd never brought a date to a family party, there was plenty of photographic evidence that I had. And who let me have that hair cut? 

Seeing everyone was good for my soul, if not for my diet (lots of yummy food!) and a great way to start the new year. 

See you tomorrow -
N. 

icepolocypse 2011 day 2

Uncle Cletus's potato fork came in handy today. It's pretty darn good at chipping off the ice.

And there is plenty of ice.

Another day of no work.

I spent hours clearing the ice off the car. And the damn thing won't budge.

Stuck as stuck can be.

city snow

[click on the title for the full post]

It's not pretty, but I got the sidewalk in front of my house and most of the driveway shoveled by 7:00 this morning.

Even if I'm the only one on my block that shovels the sidewalk, I feel weird if I don't. And as the landlord, I also shovel the driveway and a path for the tenant to get from the driveway to his side of the house and a path through the front yard for the mailman.

As a kid on the farm the most delicate tool we used to move snow around was a scoop shovel - the same one we used to "clean out" the cow barn, I might add. At least shoveling snow with it knocked some of the stink off.

Snow removal typically involved the John Deere B tractor and the attached front scoop. I loved being part of it when I was younger even though that meant freezing my little arms off to do it. Note the lack of cab or any sort of windbreak.

Shoveling snow is the city is a privilege that I enjoy. We're supposed to get walloped with snow again this weekend. I'll be the one on Winthrop with my shovel, Uncle Cletus' potato fork, and a big frozen smile on my face.

snow daze

I'm sharing 20 memories in honor of living in my house for 20 years. This is #6.

While there have been many snow storms in the 20 years I've lived at Chez Pez, January 2014 was extra memorable. While snow had been predicted, the ice was what brought the city to a halt. Power lines and trees snapped under the weight. 

It was so icy that I had to use Uncle Cletus's potato fork as a walking stick. 

Luckily my side of the street only lost power for about eight hours - not enough time to freeze any pipes or do any serious damage. Unfortunately for the other side of the street didn't have any electricity for two days. 

The temperature was below zero and I felt terrible for the folks on the west side. I let everyone know that my house was open for cell phone charging, hand warming, coffee drinking, bathroom using, and even sleeping. 

That first day I heard a huge crash. A tree had fallen my neighbor to the north's house and sheared off the power box to this house. 

As you can imagine, he was gobsmacked and discombobulated. I called the power company for him and they said that the box would need to be repaired before they could come out and with whole chunks of the city out of electricity fixing one household was way down on their priority list. 

I talked him though calling his insurance agent who called a repair man to fix the box - in a day or two. 

I gathered all of my extension cords, plugged them in to a basement outlet, snaked them through the dryer outlet and stretched them to the neighbor's house in an effort to keep his pipes from freezing. 

I invited the neighbor...I was fairly confident that his first name was Al, but had no idea of his last....to sleep on my sofa. He doesn't have any immediate family and his closest relatives lived out of state. 

He was a thoughtful guest, but I think he was a little bored. I don't have a television in the living room and I wasn't comfortable inviting him to watch a show in my bedroom. He didn't seem to be a reader and we weren't coming up with any conversation topics that seemed to take. 

On the second night I introduced him to Netflix on my laptop. He was thrilled to watch Westerns and I could retreat to my room with out feeling too guilty. 

On the fifth day, finally, Al got his power restored. 

I'm still not sure of his last name.....

auction

I loved going to farm auctions when I was young. It was a good chance to mill around adults and have free rein to look through boxes and explore tables lined with stuff. I didn't have much interest in looking at tractors or kicking the tires on a Buick, but I did love opening the lid of a cigar box to see what treasures were waiting. And wondering how people could part with exotic things as salt and pepper shakers that looked like dogs or butter churns or old shop calendars. I could usually talk Dad in to bidding a quarter or fifty cents on a box of match books or stack of old magazines for me. Eating from the concessions trailer was also big news - and about as close as we ever got to fast food.

When I was older I realized that that farm auctions happen around life events: someone died, retired or moved to town. It took some of the fun out of it, but I've come to appreciate how the auction ties things together, almost like the funeral all over again. 

As sad as I knew it would be, I was looking forward to the auction of Uncle Cletus and Aunt Mary Alice's (she is at an assisted living facility in town) household goods. All of their grandchildren were coming to town. 

Dad and I drove up together in the rain and discussed what we'd like to buy. Dad really wanted one of the stainless steel stock pots and I knew that I wanted a rake or shovel or something that family hands held. 

Here is dad picking out his pot. The auctioneer was great and funny. I'm not sure whether it was the rain or the economy, but things were selling really low. 

My trusty rain boots came in handy, once again. Cass County got some crazy amount of rain, too much rain for the newly planted crops. 

Cousin Judi and her daughters Rachel and Brandi. 

Buck and Cousin Cynthia

I wound up with the Nativity scene. It was an accidental bid, but I'm happy that I have it. 

These safety glasses were in a box of treasures that Buck bought. 

Cynthia and I both had our sights set on these chairs - the one I got used to be in my great-grandfather's tavern. It is painted the same grey that my table and two chairs are. I wonder how many gallons of that utilitarian grey paint the Spitznogle's went through over the years - or maybe I just have the four things painted that color. The chair did have one minor problem. The legs were cut off about six inches, making it really short. I'm sure it was used for some chore and it made sense at the time. I also bought the double wash tub behind us. It will be a great drink cooler for backyard parties. 

Dad told us that his dad paid twenty-five cents for this "sled." That was dad's opening bid. Cousin Leo bought it. 

Luci, Sydney, Leo and Nina. 

I can't imagine how hard the sale was on "the kids." It was fun to have some laughter near the end. Dad and Nina were bidding on the same item. It turned out that Dad wanted the horse shoes and Nina a coat that was in the same lot, so they shared. There was a lot of trading going on. I bought a chair and Virgin Mary artwork. I really wanted the art and Angie wanted the chair - it was fun to be able to give it to her. 

I think all of the grand-kids and nieces and nephews that were there bought a garden tool. I got a potato fork and hoe.

Dad got the pipe organ parts and other miscellaneous church stuff. That screen is from a confession box. I was starting to wonder how we were going to fit all of our treasures in the Suburbian. Dad also bought several lots of lumber. 

At one point Dad bid fifty cents for something. The auctioneer told him he'd pay him the difference if Dad would bid a dollar. Here he is making good on his promise. 

Loading the truck was a little tricky. We stacked all of the lumber on the folded down back seat and wedged everything else in the back. There was no room for the pot so I held it the hour and a half home. 

Which was ironic, when I discovered my beloved MacBook was squashed under the load of wood. I'd worked on my column on the way down and left the computer in my bag on the front seat. At some point in the day, Dad decided it would be safer under a blanket in the back. He forgot about it, until I asked where it was. 

To my credit, I didn't yell or freak-out or cry, although I sure wanted to. But it was a long ride home with that damn pot rattling on my lap. And all's well that ends well. I'm writing this post on the laptop. 

For more photos click here.